CLICK HERE to read the story I wrote last January (2013) upon learning my mother had been killed in a car accident, only a week after we did my father’s temple work.
CLICK HERE to read the letter I wrote to the driver of the jeep.
CLICK HERE to read the eulogy Nathan gave at the funeral.
CLICK HERE to read the article I wrote for Deseret News about it all last Mother’s Day.
It’s not a dramatic flashback, really, I just needed the whole story all in one place, so there you go. I don’t actually intend for you to have to relive my traumas or anything.
And so today was the second to last piece of closure for her final arrangements: placing the grave marker that I made her for Mother’s Day. I hope she likes it. It’s not a fancy headstone, or an official marker, but I tried hard and it is my very best I could do.
Nathan dug a little place above where we buried her last year, because we had permission as long as it was flat with the ground for the mowers, and he and I pushed the dirt in around it best we could. Then then we let the two older girls decorate with the flowers, and let five and the toddler put flowers down, also.
We also put flowers down on the graves of my grandmother (whom I loved a lot), her sister (who taught me how to say bad words and my grandma always said I was too much like), and my great-grandmother (that I remember sitting on her front porch playing with old school toys):
It was really special, and I was glad five was there, since he was with us last summer when we finally got to bury her ashes. He was especially delighted with our tradition of sprinkling out some Cheetos for her.
When the kids were finished, they went back to the car to finish their movies and Nathan and I took some time to rest and cry. I cried and cried and cried. But it was good, and different, since we got our sealings done. I am so grateful for temples! I still miss her so much, though, and my dad, though I am glad they have this time together.
I do love her, still, my mom.
Happy Mother’s Day, Mama.
I hope you can feel our hug.