I loved your letter, thank you! I am so glad you had fun making cupcakes at church last night! I know you love to cook. Keep your new Faith in God book with your scriptures so it isn’t lost. What was it like to have a new interpreter? How does it feel to be so grown-up to get to try new things? You are gaining such independence! I will call you again tonight on Papa’s phone. I love you!
Remember, we have so often talked about how that when we make good choices, we get more fun and more freedom and more happiness. It is also true that we will have more happiness when we are just ourselves. Part of autism is sometimes acting out other things you have seen, like in movies or things your brothers do. But your life is not a movie, and you are not your brothers. You are Alex, and the freedom to be just Alex is what will make you happy. I already have a Kirk and a Barrett, and don’t need more of them. I need an Alex, and only you can do that. When you throw a baby for like a four year old who is acting like a two year old, or try to take medicine like someone who has cerebral palsy, it is weird and creepy and confusing, and I feel sad and tired because I miss you – because you have hidden Alex away, and you are the only Alex I have. Remember that song from Creekbank? It goes:
If I were a bird, I could fly
High as the stars in the sky
But a bird I’ll never be
So I’m happy, you see
Just being me, being me
Papa can play the song for you when it is a good time. It might be a good song for us to study for awhile, and maybe that’s the video we could make on a Sunday when I get home. Just be Alex.
I love you.
Thank you for your letter! It was so kind, and I felt so happy. How was school? What do you think of your new teacher? How does it feel for them to change things up after you got started? Tell me about how your choices and interactions are making it a “good class”? I love you!
I loved seeing your smiled when you told me about having a good day with Papa! How can you have good days with your teacher, too, when you go back to class? What will help you remember to use your words instead of screaming? Remember to wear your church suit for your apology to her; it will help you remember to behave like a gentleman. We all have hard days and make mistakes, so it is important to learn what to do about it and how to fix them best we can. You are a good boy, and we love you, and God loves you. Your teacher loves you, too, and she knows bad choices do not make kids bad. But you might have more fun, more freedom, and more happiness, if you follow directions and take turns and use your words – all of this is part of being kind to others. Tell me about it tonight! I love you!
P.S. Reminder for Papa: Tell his teacher he never wrote your letters sideways before. I don’t know what that is about.
When I am sick or don’t feel good, it is extra hard to function. Remember to still use your words even when you do not feel well, and Papa can get the doctor to look at your ears and Barrett’s ears. You have such a strong spirit, and learning to effectively express yourself in ways that help meet your needs and is kind to others will be a big thing to learn. How do you want others to know they are loved? When do you feel loved? I love you so much, and I felt loved when you gave me that big smile last night!
Hi, baby girl! I love you! Will you help Papa sing my song so the kids know I miss them so much?
We talked the whole night through.
Good morning to you!
I love you! Have a good day! Bye-bye!