Little Yellow House Farewell

This just puked out of me, right in the middle of Subway, all over my phone:

I have just finished moving out the last of the inside things out of my miracle house,
my little yellow house in which my life was saved,
again,
my miracle house that was for me,
with its little garden
in which I learned to hear and to sing,
the house that grew me up in the temple,
and became a temple space
to heal me and to teach me,
the little house just for me,
for me and my mom,
for me and my husband,
where I grieved my mother
and my babies,
where I received new children that were not mine,
some of whom might be,
or not.
It’s a tear like a poem,
and they were years of burden that bought my freedom,
years in which I became me.
It is a moment that feels like my baptism,
when I we confident it was right
but knew life would never be the same,
and felt the great unknown laying before me as I stepped off into an abyss of darkness,
not knowing it would all become light.
Now,
on the other side,
looking back from within the light,
I see it slip away not in grief,
but release,
as if the house itself was a task,
an assignment,
a calling,
an appointment.
And now it is done.

Posted in House permalink

About Emily

I am a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints since 2009. I serve as a Chaplain, and work as a counselor. I got bilateral cochlear implants in 2010, but will always love sign language. I choose books over television, and organics over processed. Nothing is as close to flying as ballroom dancing - except maybe running, when in the solo mood. I would rather be outside than anywhere else, especially at the river riding my bike or kayaking. PhD in Marriage and Family Therapy, and currently doing a post-doc in Jewish Studies and an MDiv in Pastoral Counseling. The best thing about Emily World is that it's always an adventure, even if (not so) grammatically precise. The only thing better than writing is being married to a writer. Nathan Christensen and I were married in the Oklahoma City temple on 13 October 2012, and have since fostered more than eighty-five children. We have adopted the six who stayed, and are totally and completely and helplessly in love with our family. Nathan writes musical theater, including "Broadcast" (a musical history of the radio) and an adaption of Lois Lowry's "The Giver". He served his mission in South Korea, has taught song-writing in New York City public schools, and worked as a theater critic for a Tucson newspaper. This is not an official Web site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.

Comments

Little Yellow House Farewell — 5 Comments

  1. Good luck with this wonderful new phase of your life! Praying for you and your family. :)