Walk at the River

I am trying hard to function.

I miss my mom.

My hCG isn’t rising like it should, and something about progesterone, so trading in the almond milk and going back to soy (which they took me off of because of the whacky ovaries in the first place).

And exercise, they say, but not too much too fast, just a lot slowly.

It’s complicated.

I am not sure my brain is listening.

I am trying hard to function.

The one thing that has been constant for six years now is this river, where I have grieved and healed and now grieve again. It gives me air in my lungs, and the sun dances light into my eyes, and the wind breathes life into my skin again.

And so I walk, slowly now, slowly.

But I walk and walk and walk.

And I take pictures, because that is what I do, and if my eyes stop seeing then they fill with tears.

So I just keep clicking.

You can pretend it’s a sneak peak at this weekend’s Instagram.

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About Emily

I am a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints since 2009. I serve as a Chaplain, and work as a counselor. I got bilateral cochlear implants in 2010, but will always love sign language. I choose books over television, and organics over processed. Nothing is as close to flying as ballroom dancing - except maybe running, when in the solo mood. I would rather be outside than anywhere else, especially at the river riding my bike or kayaking. PhD in Marriage and Family Therapy, and currently doing a post-doc in Jewish Studies and an MDiv in Pastoral Counseling. The best thing about Emily World is that it's always an adventure, even if (not so) grammatically precise. The only thing better than writing is being married to a writer. Nathan Christensen and I were married in the Oklahoma City temple on 13 October 2012, and have since fostered more than eighty-five children. We have adopted the six who stayed, and are totally and completely and helplessly in love with our family. Nathan writes musical theater, including "Broadcast" (a musical history of the radio) and an adaption of Lois Lowry's "The Giver". He served his mission in South Korea, has taught song-writing in New York City public schools, and worked as a theater critic for a Tucson newspaper. This is not an official Web site of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.

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